Ohio Valley SAA Intergroup

 

Am I an Addict? - A Useful Tool for Self Assessment

Sex Addiction can involve a wide variety of practices. Sometimes an addict has trouble with just one unwanted behavior, sometimes with many. A large number of sex addicts say their unhealthy use of sex has been a progressive process. It may have started with an addiction to masturbation, pornography (either printed or electronic), or a relationship, but over the years progressed to increasingly dangerous behaviors.

The essence of all addiction is in the addict's experience of powerlessness over a compulsive behavior resulting in their lives becoming unmanageable. The addict is out of control and experiences tremendous shame, pain and self-loathing. The addict may wish to stop --- yet repeatedly fails to do so. The unmanageability of an addict's life can be seen in the consequences they suffer: losing relationships, difficulties with work, arrests, financial troubles, a loss of interest in things not sexual, low self esteem and despair.

Sexual preoccupation takes up tremendous amounts of energy. As this increases for the sex addict a pattern of behaviors (or rituals) follow, which usually lead to acting out. For some this may mean flirting, searching the net for pornography, or driving to a park where they can engage in anonymous sexual activity. When this acting out happens, there is a denial of feelings usually followed by despair and shame or a feeling of hopelessness and confusion.

To better understand if you may be a sex addict, take this Self-Test:

1. Do you frequently feel remorse, shame, or guilt after a sexual encounter?

2. Do you keep secrets about your sexual activities from those important to you? Do you lead a double life?

3. Have you ever felt hopeless or suicidal as a result of your sexual behavior?

4. Have you failed at attempts to stop or reduce your preferred sexual activity?

5. Do you find that you use sex to deal with stress, loneliness, sadness, fear, or anger?

6. Are there times when your sexual urges, thoughts, or images seem to control you?

7. Do you find yourself looking for sexually arousing articles or scenes in the media?

8. Do your sexual thoughts about people make it difficult to fully relate to them?

9. Do you spend inordinate time thinking of sex?

10. Do your sexual activities include the risk, threat, or reality of disease, pregnancy, coercion, or violence?

11. Have you been arrested or are you in danger of arrest because of your sexual behavior?

12. Do your sexual relationships interfere with your spiritual beliefs or development?

13. Have your relationships been negatively impacted by your sexual activities?

14. Has the need for sex driven you to associate with people or spend time in places you would not normally choose?

15. Has your work suffered because of your sexual activities?

16. Is sex your most important need?

If you answered yes to more than one of these questions, we would encourage you to seek out additional literature as a resource or to attend a Sex Addicts Anonymous meeting to further assess your needs. If you have questions, please contact us. Your anonymity and confidentiality will be protected.

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